Did my ex- lover sound manipulative?

Your ex lover is not manipulative; she has low self-esteem, because she is questioning your feeling for her. She doesn't believe you to be fully falling for her, that is why she feels so unsecured and wants you to reconfirm your feeling for her. Beside, if she doesn't care about you, she would have end the relationship with you than having a discuss about it. Most of time when people accusing other people about their falsehood is mostly derived from the own lack of confidence and self-esteem.